Case of the crazies

I think I am having a case of the crazies...

I was sitting here on my computer this afternoon.. All was quiet, now one was around, and then all of a sudden, Indi's jumping zebra started going off.. Now this particular toy NEVER goes of unless someone touches it. No one was here. Just me, and I wasn't near it, I actually had my back to it.

I think maybe Owen was here playing behind me, while I was working and Indi was in bed. Do you think it's possible or am I just sounding more crazier by the day.

Missing Out

This is going to sound so silly, but I just have to get it out...

I was just sitting here watching a movie.. and a thought occured to me.  I will never see Owen fall in love, I will never see him marry the love of his life, I will never see him have his own children and become a father.

I've always thought about the now that I will be missing. Never getting anymore cuddles, never to hear his first words, I never heard what his voice sounded like because I never got to hear that first cry. I'll never get to see him play with his brothers and sisters. But tonight watching the movies. It all occured to me that it's not just the "now" that I'm missing, I'm going to be missing it all.

It sounds so silly doesn't it. I can't believe this thought never went thru my mind before.