One of those weeks....

I'm having one of those weeks..

You know the ones I'm talking about..

I'm not sleeping. It's not because I'm getting up a million times a night or anything, because I'm not. In fact. I don't need to go at all during the night.. Lucky I know.

It's more that I keep having dreams/nightmares. I can't help my mind from wandering. I come up with all different scenarios that could happen.. From little things being wrong with our baby, to loosing another child.

I'm moody. I'm emotional. I'm fighting with my husband. I'm angry. I dont' want to go out. I don't really want to see people. I feel stressed at times, and that just freaks me out more. What if I'm hurting the baby. What if I'm causing it to be/get sick. What If I cause this baby to die because I'm just all over the place with everything.

I'm really missing Owen this week (and now I'm crying). I'm looking at my little girl watching Dora, and I just feel so sad. Owen should be here too.

I know, that if we didn't loose Owen, we would never had had the opportunity to meet this baby. I do love this baby, but I'm just so so soooooo scared something is going to happen again..