It was so nice to see her, as I've stayed in my "bubble" for the last few weeks and haven't even been able to say yes to people coming over. But I did it. You would think being one of my best friends, it wouldn't be that big of a deal for her to come over, but for me it was. I have had my certain "people" that I have been able to see like my husband, mum etc. but apart from those few people, I haven't been able to see "outsiders". So today was a step.
She was here for me and we could just sit and be and talk if I wanted. She didn't try to force me to talk about anything in particular. But I did talk about my labour, the birth of Owen, and most importantly talk about Owen. I cried, of course. I miss my son. But it was nice to talk about him. I shared photos of him with her aswell and it was beautiful. I enjoyed being able to share him with her and having a cry.
She even had her little one with her and I had a cuddle (she is 6mnths) It made me think of Owen again and how much I do miss him, but it was nice to have a cuddle
Talking about him seems to be easier than actually talking about my feeling and how I am feeling. So for now this is enough. Writing my feelings is easier, so thats what I do.
I love talking about my babies, even though it may make me cry, it still feels good to acknowledge them. Good job today, and you are right, you will get through this one step at a time.
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